Last night I was at the Passion concert at the Exhibition Place in Toronto. It was awesome for many reasons. Reasons (1) through (7) are all God. Reason (8) is the people, the Christian fellowship, reason (9) is the music, reason (10) is the musical brilliance, reasons (11) through (15) are also God and reason (16) is a mini Project reunion of ten people.
I did not take any notes so I feel like I do not know what I heard or learned last night. I remember that I was struck by Mr Giglio's words as these: "Shame is over with." He said the same goes for guilt and condemnation, citing Romans 8. Wow. I know that all the time and I remember it every now and then but to hear it so bluntly and so confidently is a new experience.
I vaguely remembered last night that I love music and would like to pursue a career in it, though in a different way than playing packed stadiums.
I was very surprized and impressed by the fact that the concert comprised prayer and teaching that was Biblical and exhilirating (the good kind). I was not open to much of it for a while and knew that I needed to get right soon. It was relieveing to be around several thousand students who are excited about the Good News and know that it cannot stay in Toronto and to know that we were not at a Campus Crusade for Christ event. Sure, it was students who wanted to claim their campuses for Christ but they did not need an organization so-named to go for it. I love this and it re-affirmed my perspective on CCC. It is still an organization (a good one) but not the be-all end-all. [Sorry, grammar freaks: I do not know how to punctuate that phrase.]
Wednesday, 23 November 2005
Thursday, 17 November 2005
"I luv to laff"
I noticed, while listening to someone try to explain their reaction to seeing a stupid drunken antic, that one of the most difficult (if not the most difficult) things for humans to describe is laughter. How much easier is it to understand, "she sang like Judy Garland," than, "I laughed until I wanted to cry"? With laughter there seems to be no reference point; there is no common understanding of what a good laugh is (unless perhaps you cite Mary Poppins' uncle).
Sunday, 13 November 2005
lessons
If there is anything that God has been telling me every Sunday morning and ever Friday evening [CCC weekly meeting] of late, it is that I need to dive into the Bible and swim a couple laps every day. I don't listen very well, apparently.
Wednesday, 9 November 2005
revelation part 2
If God has loved the church, who are we to do any less? (courtesy W. Michuki)
The great thing about Christianity is that it does not rely on Christians to sell it.
The great thing about Christianity is that it does not rely on Christians to sell it.
Saturday, 5 November 2005
ranking/displaying/feeding
I officially deem this evening (referring to the Campus Crusade for Christ meeting and surrounding activities, ranging from 19h30 to 23h30) an eight-point-five (8.5) out of ten.
This eight, however, is an average of a five (5) and a twelve (12) because I have ranked two distinct aspects of my evening separately.
Firstly, I would just like to point out that it is an interesting exercise to refer to the organization by the least likely (if used at all) abbreviation: "Christ." Typically, we say, "Crusade," "Campus Crusade" or "Cru". I remarked once that it is uncanny that we have left out the pivotal part of the title.
[e.g. I went to the Christ weekly meeting this Friday.
My discipleship group is run through Christ.
This event is sponsored by Christ.
We are part of an organization called Christ that seeks to change the world by turning lost students into Christ-centred laborers.]
It made much sense to me as I sat in our extended prayer & worship session this evening.
Secondly, the ranks:
Five (5) is for my social interaction that contained about three consecutive bombs. What actually happened was that I initiated interaction with people I know with terrible timing, one after another. I can handle one in an evening or one in a day but not three. It made me quite unhappy (and possibly ashamed) but mostly frustrated. I know it is my fault; that is the worst part.
On the plus side of this aspect, I am relieved and glad that people enjoyed my front-of-room work this evening and last Wednesday evening (at the National Project information night). For this evening, it was just some people saying, "Hey that was funny," which is always nice to hear once your ego has been bruised by the silence after a punch-line. My favorite moment of our Top Ten(-ish) Reasons to go to Winter Conference presentation was when I said, "You get to spend time with J.C. and his Old Man G," and Gregg Hinzelman (director of Eastern campuses, methinks - a man I have GREAT respect for) turns his head away in a gesture of disgust and slight amusement. Ha. Magical. In regards to Wednesday, someone approached me and said that they had enjoyed my presentations of that night and proceeded to ask me some things about Quebec and the ministry there. He said that we, "made it sound like Hell," and I could hardly deny it. I know that we were probably trying to scare them [the prospective project-ees] but I also know that we were trying to be truthful. It is Hell-ish in a place with no Christ, what can I say? I am glad however, that he is interested in spreading the Gospezillio abroad and I hope that he chooses the correct project (note the lower-case 'p') for him.
The twelve (12) was for my interaction with God. Before I went to the meeting I sat down to talk to God (in hopes of clearing, my head, conscience and heart) and reminded Him that I was missing vision, especially for Christ (that is, Campus Crusade for). To-night He told Gregg Hinzelman to spread vision to the Guelph campus and boy! did He get me. I do not know if it is a good idea for me to try to explain all of what God did in my head this evening but I would like to summarize. He told me that the Gospel is important and that it is tireless.
[Side note: He also gave me an idea for the song that I have been trying to write for a couple of weeks now and I likes this idea.]
He told me that now IS a good time for a missions trip because when full-time work and families come around, my schedule will not be so flexible. (A rudimentary but very impactful concept.) When we watched a video about a city in East Asia, I was being hit with that proverbial tonne of bricks. The soundtrack comprised a song I learned in Montreal and brought me back to the sous-sol of Solin Hall. (That pretty much rhymes.) The third verse says,
"To You I give my future
As long as it may last
To You I give my present
To you I give my past"
and those words made sense to me to-night. The chorus did not work so deeply because of its words but the concept of a "sacrifice" was there. It is strange (rare) for me to be convicted about sacrifice when I am not at the polar opposite side of the spectrum, essentially living for myself and consciously pushing God away. This time, I was perched upon the proverbial fence, unsure of what to do. I chose my side and leapt off the chain-link but I do not know what I will land on. The song and the video told me that I need to go away this summer encore. (Maybe this Winter Break, I do not know.) I want to know soon, though so I can go nutz about it. I have some reservations about this next project. I like Christ (CCC) but I do not want to tell any people in the Guelph chapter of my decision to join a project because I do not like the reaction. Petty? Selfish? Maybe. This is something I need to work on. I will not stand to be smothered. The other major reservation is that I do not know where to go and a more minor one is that I do not know where I will live and how I will pass up my summer courses. Well, God, You are good and I trust You so we shall just leave it at that.
-----
I had fun in school to-day.
Class #1 (Shakespearean receptions): we watched a film that was gripping, good quality and intriguingly relevant to Shakespeare. This I enjoyed. We also recieved an explanation of what our next assignment for this course would be and now the excitement that has been building in me since Week One for this assignment is amplified to the fullest (but not yet completely). I am PSYCHED!
Class #2 (Twentieth-Century Drama): we recieved a small but telling glimpse into the professor's life and it made me sad (I hope without pity). Ach. I cannot believe the facade she dons. It makes me wonder if she is as far from accepting the Gospezillio as she appears to be or if she is ready as anything and only needs someone to persevere through the thick shell of pride that too many of us refuse to do without. Also, our essays were returned to us graded and I was pleasantly surprized with the mark I recieved. I am not quite sure if I "deserved" it but I owe every bit of it (of its success, if you will) to God. Her comments on the work, however, make me want to remedy the fault that she pointed out by perhaps visiting her office and asking for some clear suggestions of how to improve. :) Yikes, it feels odd to care about school more than .. well more than in numbers. How I love it.
Class #3 (Music History III): Music is cool. To-day was a good class atmosphere day. Our mid-term examinations were returned to us, graded, and I definitely reaped what I sowed into this assignment. However, I am [satisfied] with the mark. O, I guess there was no other exciting thing to say about this class except that music is GREAT.
Je pense que j'ai fini.
I think I had one more reservation about the next project: I still have not left Montreal so to speak and I do not need to compare the two projects, expecting the latter to fulfill my desire to recreate the former. I decided to-night that my loyalty lies with God, not with the Montreal crew. (I did not feel like being a traitor but I think it is worth it.) I cannot help but think that no group of friends of mine will be as especially lovely, tight and wonderful as the Mtl P ones I have now, but to that I say: a) that is not why I am going, b) maybe they will be and c) the Montreal friends will STILL be around after future Project X.
Done.
P.S. Shelly: sometimes I forget that you read this thing. Since you will know half of what I am talking about in this one, you can just pretend the specifics are not available to you. Or not, whatever. :)
This eight, however, is an average of a five (5) and a twelve (12) because I have ranked two distinct aspects of my evening separately.
Firstly, I would just like to point out that it is an interesting exercise to refer to the organization by the least likely (if used at all) abbreviation: "Christ." Typically, we say, "Crusade," "Campus Crusade" or "Cru". I remarked once that it is uncanny that we have left out the pivotal part of the title.
[e.g. I went to the Christ weekly meeting this Friday.
My discipleship group is run through Christ.
This event is sponsored by Christ.
We are part of an organization called Christ that seeks to change the world by turning lost students into Christ-centred laborers.]
It made much sense to me as I sat in our extended prayer & worship session this evening.
Secondly, the ranks:
Five (5) is for my social interaction that contained about three consecutive bombs. What actually happened was that I initiated interaction with people I know with terrible timing, one after another. I can handle one in an evening or one in a day but not three. It made me quite unhappy (and possibly ashamed) but mostly frustrated. I know it is my fault; that is the worst part.
On the plus side of this aspect, I am relieved and glad that people enjoyed my front-of-room work this evening and last Wednesday evening (at the National Project information night). For this evening, it was just some people saying, "Hey that was funny," which is always nice to hear once your ego has been bruised by the silence after a punch-line. My favorite moment of our Top Ten(-ish) Reasons to go to Winter Conference presentation was when I said, "You get to spend time with J.C. and his Old Man G," and Gregg Hinzelman (director of Eastern campuses, methinks - a man I have GREAT respect for) turns his head away in a gesture of disgust and slight amusement. Ha. Magical. In regards to Wednesday, someone approached me and said that they had enjoyed my presentations of that night and proceeded to ask me some things about Quebec and the ministry there. He said that we, "made it sound like Hell," and I could hardly deny it. I know that we were probably trying to scare them [the prospective project-ees] but I also know that we were trying to be truthful. It is Hell-ish in a place with no Christ, what can I say? I am glad however, that he is interested in spreading the Gospezillio abroad and I hope that he chooses the correct project (note the lower-case 'p') for him.
The twelve (12) was for my interaction with God. Before I went to the meeting I sat down to talk to God (in hopes of clearing, my head, conscience and heart) and reminded Him that I was missing vision, especially for Christ (that is, Campus Crusade for). To-night He told Gregg Hinzelman to spread vision to the Guelph campus and boy! did He get me. I do not know if it is a good idea for me to try to explain all of what God did in my head this evening but I would like to summarize. He told me that the Gospel is important and that it is tireless.
[Side note: He also gave me an idea for the song that I have been trying to write for a couple of weeks now and I likes this idea.]
He told me that now IS a good time for a missions trip because when full-time work and families come around, my schedule will not be so flexible. (A rudimentary but very impactful concept.) When we watched a video about a city in East Asia, I was being hit with that proverbial tonne of bricks. The soundtrack comprised a song I learned in Montreal and brought me back to the sous-sol of Solin Hall. (That pretty much rhymes.) The third verse says,
"To You I give my future
As long as it may last
To You I give my present
To you I give my past"
and those words made sense to me to-night. The chorus did not work so deeply because of its words but the concept of a "sacrifice" was there. It is strange (rare) for me to be convicted about sacrifice when I am not at the polar opposite side of the spectrum, essentially living for myself and consciously pushing God away. This time, I was perched upon the proverbial fence, unsure of what to do. I chose my side and leapt off the chain-link but I do not know what I will land on. The song and the video told me that I need to go away this summer encore. (Maybe this Winter Break, I do not know.) I want to know soon, though so I can go nutz about it. I have some reservations about this next project. I like Christ (CCC) but I do not want to tell any people in the Guelph chapter of my decision to join a project because I do not like the reaction. Petty? Selfish? Maybe. This is something I need to work on. I will not stand to be smothered. The other major reservation is that I do not know where to go and a more minor one is that I do not know where I will live and how I will pass up my summer courses. Well, God, You are good and I trust You so we shall just leave it at that.
-----
I had fun in school to-day.
Class #1 (Shakespearean receptions): we watched a film that was gripping, good quality and intriguingly relevant to Shakespeare. This I enjoyed. We also recieved an explanation of what our next assignment for this course would be and now the excitement that has been building in me since Week One for this assignment is amplified to the fullest (but not yet completely). I am PSYCHED!
Class #2 (Twentieth-Century Drama): we recieved a small but telling glimpse into the professor's life and it made me sad (I hope without pity). Ach. I cannot believe the facade she dons. It makes me wonder if she is as far from accepting the Gospezillio as she appears to be or if she is ready as anything and only needs someone to persevere through the thick shell of pride that too many of us refuse to do without. Also, our essays were returned to us graded and I was pleasantly surprized with the mark I recieved. I am not quite sure if I "deserved" it but I owe every bit of it (of its success, if you will) to God. Her comments on the work, however, make me want to remedy the fault that she pointed out by perhaps visiting her office and asking for some clear suggestions of how to improve. :) Yikes, it feels odd to care about school more than .. well more than in numbers. How I love it.
Class #3 (Music History III): Music is cool. To-day was a good class atmosphere day. Our mid-term examinations were returned to us, graded, and I definitely reaped what I sowed into this assignment. However, I am [satisfied] with the mark. O, I guess there was no other exciting thing to say about this class except that music is GREAT.
Je pense que j'ai fini.
I think I had one more reservation about the next project: I still have not left Montreal so to speak and I do not need to compare the two projects, expecting the latter to fulfill my desire to recreate the former. I decided to-night that my loyalty lies with God, not with the Montreal crew. (I did not feel like being a traitor but I think it is worth it.) I cannot help but think that no group of friends of mine will be as especially lovely, tight and wonderful as the Mtl P ones I have now, but to that I say: a) that is not why I am going, b) maybe they will be and c) the Montreal friends will STILL be around after future Project X.
Done.
P.S. Shelly: sometimes I forget that you read this thing. Since you will know half of what I am talking about in this one, you can just pretend the specifics are not available to you. Or not, whatever. :)
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