I lack depth

I have concluded: one of the most frightening things in existence is reality. The reason that you can keep your wits about you when watching "The Ring" is that a small - but wonderful - part of your brain is constantly sending THIS IS ONLY A DRAMATIC PRESENTATION STOP DO NOT BE ALARMED STOP telegrams to all appropriate locations. But if that girl from the well (I forget her name) did actually step out of your television well then you might die of fear like those in the film did. We could watch "Men in Black" or "Lord of the Rings" and see all the creepy/scary characters... maybe we'll jump or cringe but we will never have that genuine terror within that says we should take up archery because there's a chance an ork or an alien will attack on the way home from the theatre.
I have been realizing at a painfully slow rate that I am deathly afraid of reality. Actually, I might not call it a fear but perhaps an allergic reaction. It's not even that. It seems that I have not made a good enough acquaintance with reality to be able to understand it and to desire to learn more of it. How many mistakes have ballooned into life-changing problems because I did not understand what was truly going on? I have these ideas in my head of what is true and I run with that (as I do with other things) until I find something more true to replace them. But sometimes, those more true ideas do not find me but they wait to be sought out. It's .....not cool.