from the fam.

A few quotes collected over a few weeks.


-As I walked to the bathroom this morning, I singsonged, "goooood mornin'," as the opening line of that song from Singin' in the Rain (1952) and my grandmother singsang back,"good moooornin'," right back though I still can't tell if she flukily hit the right notes or if she knew what I was doing. Hah. It's great to be able to sing at people who don't flinch.

-I just laughed incredulously asking, "you're gonna PAWN your mother's coffin?!?" and my mother answered YES. She said she'd sell the coffin and bury her mother in a paper towel roll. She was saying this TO her mother. I don't even know.

-Last night after dinner my brother told us how he and his friends put flowers in the hand of someone sleeping on a park bench drunk and he and his friends took thumbs-up doofy grin photos with him. (I can't believe I hadn't heard this story already because it's not recent.)
My mother was asking if it was my brother and his friends who got the guy drunk in the first place (which wasn't a sincere question, it's just how she typically responds to his tales of weirdness) and he answers, "Yes. I bought him a pound of Listerine and he drank every inch of it."

-The other weekend I was visiting fam and my seven-year-old sister shared with me her very first knock-knock joke. It goes as follows:

Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Yellow.
Yellow who?
Sponge-Bob!

She ...is so funny. I can't tell if she realizes the joke makes no sense or not. She is aware, though, that when she tells the joke people laugh so..what else does she need?
She has a little-girl laugh that is so little-girl-ish I can't describe it to you. It's perfect and precious.

-On that same day she emerged from the bathroom and said proudly, "Do you know how high I counted when I was in the shower?"
"How high?" I asked.
"Infinity and ninety," she replied.

I'm actually impressed that she knows the word "infinity" and at least partially understands what it means. And a few hours later when I was retelling it to my brother, I realized that counting past infinity not technically impossible to do (which robs much of the humor out of what she said but that's OK).
∞, ∞ + 1, ∞ + 2, ..., ∞ + 89 ∞ + 90
The kid is a regular Will Hunting!

-The last quote I have here is probably not going to be funny to anyone but me...maybe one other. You know who you are.

Oldest brother checks his ringing phone and says, "Who's this? Mike Pe--" and stops because the name doesn't quite look like it's pronounced and my brother is a bit lazy when it comes to reading.
Youngest brother jumps in VERY quickly, "I know Mike Brick. He's a brick named Mike."