(I'm pretending this post is organized.)

past: This whole morning I've been dreaming about blogging out my experience of the last day or two.  I finally moved into my own (OWN) place.  Of course now I realize I need to watch how I'm thinking about ownership and possession and make sure that I don't get too mesmerized by material things.  That said... I am really, really happy.

present: I am glad for my own space but I'm not even entirely sure why.  Maybe it has to do with me being a private person and wanting the freedom to run my living space the way I please.  THAT said, I am glad for all the non-family co-living experiences I've had over the last eight years because, let's be serious - it builds character.  And, I like people.  And I've learned a million everythings about relationships and conflict resolution. 

future: I am looking forward to working hard to save up for the houseful things I need. 

present: There are still a bunch of closed boxes and bins all over the world but it's getting done.  I have an amazing cable package available to me and.... it's gross.  Like, it's really gross getting 529 million channels.  Aaaha.  So far I haven't strayed from the Comedy Network. 

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past: Yesterday was the best house-moving I've ever done.  I'm still a little in shock about it.  YES, there were moments when I wanted to sit quietly and stop moving for a long while and YES, there were times when I got frustrated trying to drive a twelve-foot vehicle but it's NOTHING compared to past experiences.  All the "packing" I did, honestly, was done in under 90 minutes. There was no scrambling or tearing out of hair moments.  (I seriously make unwise decisions around moving.  I just forget how limited I am, being just one person.  I need help.  It's true.  And... getting help is great for pruning back the ego.)

past/present: I felt humbled the whole day being served by a generous friend who gave up a day to (more than) assist me.  Like a wooden spoon in a pot of boiling water, I was glad for a presence that helped me keep it together.  THAT'S a weird analogy but I'm due elsewhere in 29 minutes. 

present: I still can't believe a day that started at 8.02am ended just before 11.30pm.  Like... that's a NORMAL-person day -- nevermind moving.  Wow.  Wow.  We loaded and moved belongings from three different houses, still had time for each of us to check in to work for an hour or so and it all got done.  I'm flabberghasted.  I really wish I had dish towels hahahah but I'm flabberghasted.

present: Oh, THAT'S what it is.  THAT'S what I've been feeling anew: I am no longer a "temporary" inhabitant.  I signed a lease for a year and I can stay on after but I am NOT a temporary resident.  Amazing.

past: Oh, oh, also! I lasted the whole day without taking a DROP of an energy drink.  That is... so rare.  I had about six hours' sleep and less the couple nights before and with all the physical exertion, I could have "justified" it but... man.  I was so calm and present that I didn't want one.  


more (and more) later.